Remember Johnny Haysman, the dude who traipsed the streets of Adelaide in gumboots and a leotard? It was an unforgettable, smile-inducing sight. Nothing warms the cockles like a man embracing his tightly encased cockles (except Tony Abbott – political nuggets should be kept at bay).
Here at the Fritz offices, we often lament the good old days when close encounters of the Johnny kind were a regular occurrence. Shopping down Rundle Mall just isn’t the same without passing the big man in his jocks. “Where is he now?” we ponder over the water cooler.
“To date, it’s only had 16 views. It deserves thousands.”
It turns out you don’t have to look far for a dose of Johnny action. The cheerful bloke has taken to YouTube to capture his latest antics. It’s hilarious stuff.
On 14 January 2017, clad in pink budgie smugglers and a midriff tie-dye top, he indulges in a spot of interpretative dancing on a beach. He calls that video ‘Happy Summer Saturday’. It’s 95 seconds of arse wiggling gold. To date, it’s only had 16 views. It deserves thousands.
One week earlier, he posted Beach Twerk Dance (more wiggling).
On Christmas Day, he speaks to the camera in ‘Seasons Greetings’.
“Hello, John here. The weather has been pretty hot so I’ve just been trying to stay cool all day. I’m drinking icy cold lemon juice which is pretty refreshing. Thirst quenching, too.”
He goes on to sing a Christmas song and talk about the pudding he had for lunch and indulges in a dance (it’s the first time we’ve seen him in trousers). It doesn’t get much more exciting than that (we prefer the dance moves) but he does refer to harvest season which indicates he’s working in the wine industry.
The highlight of the lot (so far) is ‘Car Wash’ when our main man tackles a silver car with soap, suds, large white undies and a yellow high vis. It’s like Jessica Simpson in Dukes of Hazzard, but sexier.
A Happy Halloween video picturing Johnny in an orange leotard. If moobs, chest hair, and juggling is your thing you’re in for a treat.
We salute you Johnny. Keep the videos coming. After the drought we’ve endured, we’ll take anything we can get.